Shavcarbonk is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, irritating bee.

Shavcarbonk created a strange quark nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Shavcarbonk, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Shavcarbonk, she will strike you with lightening.

Shavcarbonk's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Shavcarbonk's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Shavcarbonk's name in vain.

2. Never look at black holes.

3. You must love Shavcarbonk.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Shavcarbonk loves dolphins, so they must be respected.