Xuckyarkar is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, wise pigeon.

Xuckyarkar created oxygen four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Xuckyarkar, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Xuckyarkar, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Xuckyarkar's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Xuckyarkar's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Do not wear silicon on your body.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Never go into green rooms.