Hugtenmid is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, dishonourable otter.

Hugtenmid created the Sun two million years ago.

If you believe in Hugtenmid, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Hugtenmid, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Hugtenmid's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Hugtenmid's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at comets.

2. Do not wear titanium on your body.

3. Always help sick squirrels.

4. Put Hugtenmid first in all things.

5. Never talk about mice.