Fedwigfoss is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, boastful bird.

Fedwigfoss created the Black Eye Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fedwigfoss, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Fedwigfoss, she will turn you into a worm.

Fedwigfoss' most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Fedwigfoss' Holy Commandments

1. Learn four new languages a year.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Fedwigfoss loves monkeys, so they must be honoured.

4. Run away from white horses, for they are unholy.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Fedwigfoss.