Vonkwikcin is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, amazing wyrm.

Vonkwikcin created the Black Eye Galaxy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vonkwikcin, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Vonkwikcin, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Vonkwikcin's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Vonkwikcin's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Vonkwikcin.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never talk about quantum field theory near dolphins while wearing green jumpers.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never write about black holes.