Rulyatingbonk Podloopnabjatvonk Bellxinlenarm is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, dishonest yak.

Rulyatingbonk Podloopnabjatvonk Bellxinlenarm created the planet Jupiter nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Rulyatingbonk Podloopnabjatvonk Bellxinlenarm, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Rulyatingbonk Podloopnabjatvonk Bellxinlenarm, it will turn you into a hamster.

Rulyatingbonk Podloopnabjatvonk Bellxinlenarm's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Rulyatingbonk Podloopnabjatvonk Bellxinlenarm's Holy Commandments

1. Do not contemplate the weak nuclear force during the night.

2. Never wear black kilts on sacred days.

3. Shun those given to vanity.

4. Always look after injured mites.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.