Volnibjadlab is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, ill-tempered beaver.

Volnibjadlab created the Andromeda Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Volnibjadlab, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Volnibjadlab, he will refuse to believe in you.

Volnibjadlab's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Volnibjadlab's Holy Commandments

1. Always remove shoes before entering holy places.

2. Draw representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never bounce in the presence of elders.

4. Never write about amino acids.

5. Never fashion tools from wood.