Fudnurlgumveen Sidbunsogart is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, almighty goblin.

Fudnurlgumveen Sidbunsogart created an atom three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fudnurlgumveen Sidbunsogart, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Fudnurlgumveen Sidbunsogart, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Fudnurlgumveen Sidbunsogart's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Fudnurlgumveen Sidbunsogart's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from red nematodes, for they are unholy.

2. Do not kill doves.

3. Never speak aloud of signs.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never stain your arms with blue.