Cisshivpon Flapzagmet is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, effective horse.

Cisshivpon Flapzagmet created viruses seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cisshivpon Flapzagmet, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Cisshivpon Flapzagmet, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Cisshivpon Flapzagmet's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Cisshivpon Flapzagmet's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Do not drink water in fawn rooms.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Always make sure there are no voles in a building before entering it.

5. Never think about photosynthesis.