Cabfiddib is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, stupid centipede.

Cabfiddib created gold eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cabfiddib, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Cabfiddib, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Cabfiddib's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Cabfiddib's Holy Commandments

1. Never remain kneeling at dawn.

2. Never discuss chlorophyll in public assemblies.

3. Worship no other gods but Cabfiddib.

4. Never pray while filled with anger.

5. Never speak at midday.