Bossjamwik is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, narcissistic finch.

Bossjamwik created vertebrates two years ago.

If you believe in Bossjamwik, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Bossjamwik, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Bossjamwik's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Bossjamwik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.

2. Never look at black holes.

3. Hide from turquoise dogs for they are unholy.

4. Always make sure there are no moths in a room before entering it.

5. Never write about chromosomes.