Bamzim is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, all-powerful faun.

Bamzim created water six billion years ago.

If you believe in Bamzim, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Bamzim, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Bamzim's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Bamzim's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in indigo.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never wear stockings.

5. Never eat turnips on fasting days.