Rippasbap Ortnakdun is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, blissful parrot.

Rippasbap Ortnakdun created life eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rippasbap Ortnakdun, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Rippasbap Ortnakdun, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Rippasbap Ortnakdun's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Rippasbap Ortnakdun's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Never go into blue rooms.

3. Never fashion tools from stone.

4. Do not speak about melons.

5. Never record signs.