Queegstragfit is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, boastful dryad.

Queegstragfit created carbon four million years ago.

If you believe in Queegstragfit, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Queegstragfit, he will laugh at you.

Queegstragfit's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Queegstragfit's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no sheep in a room before entering it.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Feed all hungry capybaras.

4. Queegstragfit loves geese, so they must be respected.

5. Never write about ribonucleic acid.