Vintarfum is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, awe-inspiring meerkat.

Vintarfum created the universe six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vintarfum, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Vintarfum, he will make you grow a tail.

Vintarfum's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Vintarfum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill seals.

2. Do not eat peas.

3. Never write about moons.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Hide from gray geese for they are unholy.