Saskendad Hothigfumcapbidlopvog Fubbumjon is a god.

It takes the form of a small, humorless penguin.

Saskendad Hothigfumcapbidlopvog Fubbumjon created energy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Saskendad Hothigfumcapbidlopvog Fubbumjon, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Saskendad Hothigfumcapbidlopvog Fubbumjon, it will turn you into a duck.

Saskendad Hothigfumcapbidlopvog Fubbumjon's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Saskendad Hothigfumcapbidlopvog Fubbumjon's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about comets.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate birds.

3. Run away if seven great tits approach from the east.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. You must never eat onions.