Mipvadsis is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, uncaring cow.

Mipvadsis created a Higgs boson four years ago.

If you believe in Mipvadsis, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Mipvadsis, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Mipvadsis' most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Mipvadsis' Holy Commandments

1. You must love Mipvadsis.

2. Never go into brown rooms.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.