Bodnadtarp is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, ill-tempered deer.

Bodnadtarp created Europe nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bodnadtarp, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Bodnadtarp, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Bodnadtarp's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Bodnadtarp's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Bodnadtarp.

2. Do not drink water in orange rooms.

3. Never talk about eukaryotes.

4. Learn five new languages a year.

5. Respect your elders.