Nartrotlam is a god.
He takes the form of a giant, weak
seal.
Nartrotlam created Africa two quadrillion years ago.
If you believe in
Nartrotlam, he will give you lots of gold.
If you do not believe in
Nartrotlam, he will boil you in a big pot.
Nartrotlam's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.
Nartrotlam's Holy Commandments1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.
2. You must pray to Nartrotlam six times a day.
3. Retreat if three mice approach from the north.
4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.
5. Never look in ponds.