Bimmegbum is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, fast otter.

Bimmegbum created a top quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bimmegbum, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Bimmegbum, it will have a low opinion of you.

Bimmegbum's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Bimmegbum's Holy Commandments

1. Always maintain humility during fasting days.

2. Do not trade with those who eat strawberries.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Never remain kneeling at midday.

5. Never eat bark.