Rilwabsan Gutzodmif is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, witty jaguar.

Rilwabsan Gutzodmif created Mount Everest seven million years ago.

If you believe in Rilwabsan Gutzodmif, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Rilwabsan Gutzodmif, he will attempt to scare you with hail.

Rilwabsan Gutzodmif's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Rilwabsan Gutzodmif's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Rilwabsan Gutzodmif's priests.

2. Always wash your head before prayer.

3. Never allow seals to sleep beneath your roof.

4. Do not place apples upon stone.

5. Never prepare rice during summer.