Queegbepstik Arfyokparkvigflisrowcabmid is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, intelligent hippopotamus.

Queegbepstik Arfyokparkvigflisrowcabmid created a down quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Queegbepstik Arfyokparkvigflisrowcabmid, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Queegbepstik Arfyokparkvigflisrowcabmid, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Queegbepstik Arfyokparkvigflisrowcabmid's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Queegbepstik Arfyokparkvigflisrowcabmid's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear white.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Always wear plain jumpers during rituals.

4. Never look at comets.

5. Never fashion tools from bone.