Bitlipbarntarp is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, vain manatee.

Bitlipbarntarp created energy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bitlipbarntarp, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Bitlipbarntarp, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Bitlipbarntarp's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Bitlipbarntarp's Holy Commandments

1. Do not name children after capybaras.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not wear aluminium on your body.

4. Always wear plain stockings during rituals.

5. Do not step barefoot upon green earth.