Larnbessdapquimvog is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, smart ferret.

Larnbessdapquimvog created the Small Magellanic Cloud eight million years ago.

If you believe in Larnbessdapquimvog, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Larnbessdapquimvog, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Larnbessdapquimvog's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Larnbessdapquimvog's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant violet sculpture of Larnbessdapquimvog in the centre of the settlement.

2. Always share gooseberries with strangers, but never with swans.

3. Always look after injured doves.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Larnbessdapquimvog.

5. Do not sing in public.