Dodominjan is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, calm raven.

Dodominjan created an atom two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dodominjan, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Dodominjan, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Dodominjan's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Dodominjan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not prepare oranges while filled with fear.

2. Never talk about quantum mechanics.

3. Always store rice above ground.

4. Never laugh in the presence of elders.

5. Respect your elders.