Sinripkar is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, witless turtle.

Sinripkar created the Whirlpool Galaxy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sinripkar, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Sinripkar, he will destroy your home solar system.

Sinripkar's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Sinripkar's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never travel toward the east during summer.

3. Never point your back toward the south during prayer.

4. Never carve symbols of black holes into wood.

5. Do not step barefoot upon mauve earth.