Xensomsagvenlenzakgut is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, kind beaver.

Xensomsagvenlenzakgut created carbon eight million years ago.

If you believe in Xensomsagvenlenzakgut, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Xensomsagvenlenzakgut, it will laugh at you.

Xensomsagvenlenzakgut's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Xensomsagvenlenzakgut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always help snails.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.