Femtonflap is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, two-faced lobster.

Femtonflap created the Sun five million years ago.

If you believe in Femtonflap, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Femtonflap, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Femtonflap's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Femtonflap's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip in the presence of frogs.

2. Never approach crossroads carrying stone.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Always make sure there are no capybaras in a room before entering it.

5. Pray towards the west.