Podfigcud is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, selfish parrot.

Podfigcud created gold three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Podfigcud, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Podfigcud, it will remove you from existence.

Podfigcud's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Podfigcud's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Always wear fawn.

3. Never look at asteroids.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never write about solid mechanics.