Sitbep is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, merciful mole.

Sitbep created the Sun two million years ago.

If you believe in Sitbep, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Sitbep, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Sitbep's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Sitbep's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt porpoises.

2. Do not travel during spring.

3. Do not wear boots marked with magenta.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate aardvarks.

5. Always obey Sitbep's priests.