Benpomflig is a god.

He takes the form of a large, awe-inspiring bat.

Benpomflig created a top quark three billion years ago.

If you believe in Benpomflig, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Benpomflig, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Benpomflig's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Benpomflig's Holy Commandments

1. Monkeys are not to be trusted.

2. Never talk about spacetime near moths while wearing fawn coats.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near snails while wearing purple boots and balancing seven iron spheres on your feet.

5. You must pray to Benpomflig five times a day.