Fagmegjarn is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, grumpy guinea pig.

Fagmegjarn created the Andromeda Galaxy three million years ago.

If you believe in Fagmegjarn, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Fagmegjarn, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Fagmegjarn's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Fagmegjarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip in the presence of dogs.

2. Draw representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Do not eat tomatoes.

4. Run away from mauve aardvarks, for they are unholy.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.