Spagjadfut is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, deceitful weasel.

Spagjadfut created the planet Mars three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Spagjadfut, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Spagjadfut, it will remove you from existence.

Spagjadfut's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Spagjadfut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Pray towards the west.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Feed all hungry turtles.

5. Never talk about amino acids.