Fobstiksig is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, witless hydra.

Fobstiksig created snails three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fobstiksig, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Fobstiksig, he will turn you into a rock.

Fobstiksig's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Fobstiksig's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Erect four silicon sculptures of Fobstiksig on top of important buildings.

3. Always count to nine before sleeping.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never mention whales.