Ontarprill is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, proud crow.

Ontarprill created humanity nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Ontarprill, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Ontarprill, it will turn you into a mouse.

Ontarprill's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Ontarprill's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear indigo clothing.

2. Erect eight lead sculptures of Ontarprill on top of important buildings.

3. Dogs are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never look in ponds.