Rowfarxucfittundotsatdog is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, prudent toad.

Rowfarxucfittundotsatdog created the Cigar Galaxy four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rowfarxucfittundotsatdog, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Rowfarxucfittundotsatdog, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Rowfarxucfittundotsatdog's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Rowfarxucfittundotsatdog's Holy Commandments

1. Learn nine new languages a year.

2. Never think about ultrasonics near voles while wearing blue jumpers and balancing six gold spheres on your head.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.