Largfedtof is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, pitiless bat.

Largfedtof created a photon six million years ago.

If you believe in Largfedtof, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Largfedtof, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Largfedtof's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Largfedtof's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about optics.

2. Never hurt dogs.

3. Never think about comets.

4. Do not shave your chest.

5. Always treat great tits with great respect.