Vidnutxuck is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, tiresome faun.

Vidnutxuck created dark matter nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vidnutxuck, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Vidnutxuck, it will send minions to preach to you.

Vidnutxuck's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Vidnutxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Pray only in firelight.

3. Shun those given to sloth.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Do not listen to music.