Gemfigloop is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, idiotic sheep.

Gemfigloop created oxygen nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Gemfigloop, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Gemfigloop, he will turn you into a puffin.

Gemfigloop's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Gemfigloop's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Gemfigloop.

2. Never wear magenta coats.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.