Gadtigzimbop is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, vain naga.

Gadtigzimbop created a top quark three million years ago.

If you believe in Gadtigzimbop, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Gadtigzimbop, it will try to impress you with trees.

Gadtigzimbop's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Gadtigzimbop's Holy Commandments

1. Always help pigs in need.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Erect three platinum sculptures of Gadtigzimbop on top of important buildings.

4. Always help moths.

5. Always obey Gadtigzimbop's priests.