Pibmuttom is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, impressive aardvark.

Pibmuttom created the Sun eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Pibmuttom, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Pibmuttom, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Pibmuttom's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Pibmuttom's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear plain ear rings during rituals.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Never eat bananas.

4. Always look after injured geese.

5. You must never eat carrots.