Tagsafstan is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, fast beaver.

Tagsafstan created a bottom quark three million years ago.

If you believe in Tagsafstan, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Tagsafstan, she will cry a lot.

Tagsafstan's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Tagsafstan's Holy Commandments

1. Never gather nine great tits in one place.

2. Always treat dogs with great respect.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Always obey Tagsafstan's priests.