Yattcenquaf is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, vain chinchilla.

Yattcenquaf created the planet Saturn four billion years ago.

If you believe in Yattcenquaf, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Yattcenquaf, she will ignore you.

Yattcenquaf's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Yattcenquaf's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Yattcenquaf's priests.

2. Yattcenquaf loves snails, so they must be respected.

3. Do not keep eight nematodes in a large pit.

4. Never look at comets.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.