Zakjattad Capcisswat is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, merciful elephant.

Zakjattad Capcisswat created a bottom quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zakjattad Capcisswat, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Zakjattad Capcisswat, it will laugh at you.

Zakjattad Capcisswat's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Zakjattad Capcisswat's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about solid mechanics.

2. Never talk about ribonucleic acid.

3. Always keep your back turned to the south at sunset.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never think about ultrasonics near shrews while wearing green ear rings and balancing six silver spheres on your hands.