Mumyamjan is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, unjust meerkat.

Mumyamjan created the Andromeda Galaxy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mumyamjan, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Mumyamjan, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Mumyamjan's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Mumyamjan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not skip at rivers.

2. Never hurt moths.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Mumyamjan.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Do not count beyond six during ceremonies.