Spagnillam is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, passionate chinchilla.

Spagnillam created dark energy three million years ago.

If you believe in Spagnillam, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Spagnillam, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Spagnillam's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Spagnillam's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Do not wear green clothing.

5. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place in fawn.