Tannellbus is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, annoying salamander.

Tannellbus created humankind seven million years ago.

If you believe in Tannellbus, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Tannellbus, it will turn you into a dog.

Tannellbus' most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Tannellbus' Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat corn.

2. Always share cucumbers with strangers, but never with bats.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never sit in the presence of tapirs.

5. Never talk about amino acids.