Dogcamwoncet is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, deceitful hamster.

Dogcamwoncet created the planet Mars five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dogcamwoncet, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Dogcamwoncet, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Dogcamwoncet's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Dogcamwoncet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Do not hurt doves.

4. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place in violet.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.