Wabnullbif is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, self-assured penguin.

Wabnullbif created the Sol system seven million years ago.

If you believe in Wabnullbif, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Wabnullbif, he will turn you into a slug.

Wabnullbif's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Wabnullbif's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear skirts.

2. Learn five new languages a year.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never feed lots of figs to snails while wearing mauve ear rings.

5. Do not wear silicon on your body.