Fedhonzen is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, sapient rat.

Fedhonzen created silver four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fedhonzen, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Fedhonzen, he will turn you into a goat.

Fedhonzen's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Fedhonzen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt rats.

2. Never feed lentils to otters while wearing red dresses.

3. Never think about cell theory.

4. Never talk about ultrasonics near hamsters while wearing mauve scarves and balancing three lead spheres on your face.

5. Put Fedhonzen first in all things.