Pakgutkan is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, impressive badger.

Pakgutkan created the planet Earth six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pakgutkan, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Pakgutkan, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Pakgutkan's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Pakgutkan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about photosynthesis.

2. Hide if eight tortoises approach from the south.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Do not speak sacred words in summer.

5. Never wear black dresses.