Gabgemlikflis is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, sapient goose.

Gabgemlikflis created Europe three million years ago.

If you believe in Gabgemlikflis, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Gabgemlikflis, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Gabgemlikflis' most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Gabgemlikflis' Holy Commandments

1. Never think about electromagnetism.

2. Do not keep nine horses in a large pit.

3. Erect a giant brown sculpture of Gabgemlikflis in the centre of the settlement.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Always obey Gabgemlikflis' priests.